It seems that St. Petersburg Times columnist and resident somnambulist Dan Ruth has a Glenn Beck complex.
As much as I hate to admit it, I did see this coming. It was bad enough when he had his own radio show that didn’t quite achieve the same, shall we say, notoriety that Beck’s did; but I figured that when the Times gave him a column, he’d be a happy enough guy and let bygones be bygones.
Not so, I’m afraid. So in the spirit of bipartisanship, I sent Ruth the following note:
You probably got a flood of e-mail on this already, but I heard Jack Harris on the radio this morning vis-a-vis your latest tirade against Glenn Beck. He basically said you were, shall we say, fabricating a bit with that business about the doughnuts. Having worked in a newsroom myself, I have to come down on Jack’s side here. Newsies don’t get paid enough to turn down free food, even if it’s Kavli wafers and three-day-old cheese. For the interns, it might be the only meal they get all week.
And what’s up with all the hostility, dude? I mean, sure–he once said that your nobody should operate heavy equipment while listening to your old radio show (and I have to admit, the bumper music alone nearly put me out behind the wheel; luckily, I had a copy of Warrant’s “Cherry Pie” on hand to wake me up). But that was years ago! Time to move on, my friend.
I’d also suggest going a little lighter on the metaphors in the next column. While I appreciate a “Blazing Saddles” reference as much as the next guy, I would’ve gone with something from “Caddyshack” instead (perhaps with Beck as Judge Smails–pure gold, if you ask me). And tone down the vitriol, for Pete’s sake. You sound like a middle-aged Twilight harpie throwing down with a tween over who’s hotter, Edward or Jacob. Happy warriors are far more fun, not to mention convincing. Believe me, I say this out of nothing but love and respect–even if you are a political southpaw.
Fondly,Your Friendly Neighborhood Right-Wing Zealot (With Libertarian Tendencies)
Thanks so much for the generous note of support.